He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
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