I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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