I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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