I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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