You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Dicks are not precious.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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