I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
