I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
