David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Randomize
