WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Still dying that you shit outside
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
