i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
My vagina just recognized that song.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
