Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
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