Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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