Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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