Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
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