Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
