who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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