She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
