its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
