quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
found the other keg... it's in the tree
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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