when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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