New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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