Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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