I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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