I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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