Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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