She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
