They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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