cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
