you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize