the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
