I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
