dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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