We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
