oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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