I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Randomize
