'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
