no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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