Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
