Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
