Define "chronic" masturbator.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
