i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
