thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
