Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
