I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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