just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
NoShamevember. You game?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
