So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
