How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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