he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
