I am puke
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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