My nipple is on Facebook.
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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